Options When You're Expecting
Hello, my name is Cathleen. I have been a BSR volunteer since 2007. I have the honor of writing the feature you read on our home page each month. My little brown dogs, Anna and Bert are three years old and are both rescues (Bert came through BSR). Generally, I write about issues and challenges that face us in BSR but this month I have decided to write about an issue that I have personally faced. I appreciate you taking the time to read each month.
Earlier this year, my husband and I found out we were expecting our first child. As with most expectant couples we were elated and as soon as it was “safe” to do so we shared our happy news with our friends, families, and colleagues. While most people we told shared our excitement in our joyous addition to our family; several asked me point blank when we would be getting rid of our dogs. Now the first couple of times this happened I was stunned and laughed it off; and it was not until one particular person, a colleague of mine asked me that it really hit home that many expectant couples are asked this same question. This individual explained to me that she loved her dog but when the child came along she could no longer keep both and gave her dog away to a friend.
Soon after we found out we were expecting and before we had told anyone, we had discussed how we were going to prepare our dogs. We decided the best way was to make a list, which addressed three challenges in an effort to not make too many changes in a short period of time. Our first challenge was leash skills – we would want to take walks as a family and both Anna and Bert needed to learn to walk more obediently; secondly, their overzealous doorway welcome home complete with jumping would have to be calmed; and finally we would equip our pups by extensively playing a cd with baby sounds on it so when our new bundle came home these sounds would not be too new. Even though I explained our plan in detail to these doubtful individuals they remained dead set against having dogs and newborn babies in the same house and strongly recommended we get rid of our dogs.
If you find yourself in this position, and are faced with the tough decision of whether or not to keep your dog, you may find it helpful as we did to make a plan. Fortunately, most couples have many months to plan before the baby arrives so prepare your dogs as you prepare your home. Talk to a trainer or friends with dogs that have brought a baby home. There are also many resources through the internet and your local library. After the baby arrives, be sure you or your partner brings an item or two (such as a blanket or clothing) into your house with the baby’s smell before the baby comes home.
If you make the decision it is truly better to find a new home for your lbd please contact Boykin Spaniel Rescue. Many couples are embarrassed that they have chosen not to keep their dog and will drop them off at shelters; simply let them go or give them to an inappropriate home. If you have made this decision let us help you; we are more than happy to help you with an owner referral or may foster your dog if need be. There are people out there looking for an lbd and we do our best to match dogs to the best situation possible. There is always time and we are here to help.
Finally, your dog might surprise you and offer great comfort and support, just as Anna and Bert have to us. Very sadly, we lost our baby in the second trimester. When I arrived home from the hospital Anna and Bert laid by my side ready to give a hug or comfort at any moment I needed them. The two little brown dogs that so many had asked when they would go to another home gave me round the clock support until I was back on my feet. Although our lives have changed now Anna and Bert are still there for us every day, never asking for anything but a pat on the head and good food for their bellies.